COMING FROM WITHIN

I have failed many a time for a person my age.

Some may refer to my failures as mistakes, errors in judgement or mishaps.

I simply refer to them as 'doing what I wanted to at the time'. Do not misunderstand me, some of the failures that I have

endured are regrettable. to this day; However, I still believe that all of them served their purpose in my life.

Without these failures,

I would not have achieved half of the greatness, that I have today.

I find myself constantly challenged by the idea of having to grow up. It was not until last December that I became an upstanding member of society.

My life took a revolutionary rotation on me and everything became more urgent: Finishing school, finishing something, finishing anything.

I guess that is what happens when one has so many interests and is adaptable to most circumstances.(Or as most would put it 'ke rata dilo'-I like things')

I find it hard to maintain a sense of focus when something does not interest me. Whether it be a person, a lifestyle choice, a book, a meal; Therefore, I have taken time to figure out exactly what inspires me to move forward.

I do not often open up, to people  who are not in my 'inner circle', but I'm going to write a tell all book one day, so what better time to start than now.

(There will be Setswana, French and Spanish translations, written by me too, just by the way).

When I was younger, I always used to watch my older sisters, closer than they thought.

I would watch their every move, listen in on conversations with friends (Sorry) and I was always

in awe of everything that they did or did not do. I always wanted to be at their stage of life, be on their level of supremecy, be them.

Now that I am 'growing up' I realise that SHIT IS REAL and I need to keep myself in check. I realise that as amazing as it is to be the youngest child in a family, it is also daunting because you're always playing catch up.

I am not very good at catch up, as I do things in my own time. Yes, I have done wrong, Yes, I have done right, but

right now I feel that I am just doing okay, it is time to reach the potential that my teachers always told me I have.

As a self proclaimed spiritualist, I am grateful for my Christian foundation but I am not a devout Chrisitian. I am a firm believer in many of our higher beings and I choose to take in the positivity of life from all aspects, all cultures, all religions.

I am highly appreciative of the positive energies I am able to feed off of, tous les jours (Everyday). I am simply happy with the fact that the sun shines and releases an even bigger energy which enlightens my soul.

My take on the human race is that we are all on the road to recovery. Our mentality has shifted slightly into a gear that I am not too familiar with and I LOVE DRIVING.

I am perplexed at the way in which we interact with each other or with ourselves (Each to his own).

Maybe it has stemmed from the rapture that didnt happen; from the idea of 2012, which isn't going to happen (Insha'allah) or maybe this is how adulthodd really is.

I have defintely recovered my personal stength, by sacraficing other aspects of my life, namely school.

I have no regets herewith, but I now know that time is moving forward and I too need to progress.

Now it is about living in harmony with the three essential elements of inner happiness, MIND, BODY and SOUL. My fourth element of happiness is that of light, the fifth one, being the element of love.

With these elements in place, I have a whole handful of life to live by every day. I am certain that I can handle a handleful of life a day. Can YOU?

I am surrounded by genius individuals who are all at an all time high and have reached their personal capacity and have so much more to achieve. These people are the inspirational forces whoare, I suppose, my 'sponsors' of life. They try and steer me in the right direction and love me with their all. I have a tendency to be extremely spontaneous, so this post, mark my words, is dedicated

to solidifying my postion as a more serious individual with a refined spontaneous side.

I would like to send out my sincerest gratitude to my sponsors, all of you, from the ages of 19 to 60+. Ke le rata ha mpe(I love you a lot) and here's to turning my road to recovery into one of magnified success.

Bisous tous les jours

QueenIpel/GlassTableGirl x

P.S. 'The Chosen Choose Themselves'- via Melissa Flerangile - www.mellymelinspires.com